gpeltz Oh my, it's the, Attack of the beast creatures, (1985) Directed by Michael Stanley, and written by Robert A. Hutton. Spoiler Alert ahead. Not long ago, I was trying to define Cheesy, when it came to movies. I think I've got it. This effort might as well acknowledge the Truth in packaging laws, and call itself, Attack of the puppet hunter dolls. OK, the gimmick worked in Trilogy of Terror (1975) so now we have an island full of them.I have to hand it to this rag tag group of actors, putting their best to make this nonsense, So what have we here? A lifeboat with a handful of survivors, Five guys and Four woman. A usual bland assortment. None of them are schooled in survival skills, nor in self defense. There are the good guys; Robert Nolfi plays John, pals with Case and Phillip, as played by Robert Lengyel and Frank Murgalo, We can tell they are the good guys, they wear ties, halfway through the production. Nobody likes Mr. Morgan played by Robert Furgelusky, No one player memorable, How could they be, given the material they had to work with. I pity the fools. Same could be said for the woman. Underwritten and devoid of personality, save for Mrs Gordon, played by Kay Baily, who everyone likes. The other woman, Cathy and Diane, played by Julia Rust, and Lisa Pac, mostly are called upon to scream and run. Did I mention banal dialogue? "Look, there goes Bill running down the hill, No, don't Stop" They manage to pull off the non monster sequences, hoping that when it comes down to it. the effects won't look as phony as the toys they have to work with. They spin around with these rag dolls taped on them, and act like they are fighting off a savage attack. I am reminded of Lugosi fighting off the rubber Octopus prop,in a swamp. The gore scenes are blatantly phony. This could be said for all the effects in general, I saw the puppeteers hand manipulating the dolls, The "attacking dolls" are tossed haphazardly at the actors, while the sound artists try to figure out what these little hunters battle cry, should sound like. The effects do not match the look of the dolls, we hear the pitter patter of running feet, and the screechy sounds, none of which seem to fit the action. All the while the synthesized soundtrack by John P Mozzi, tries to find a tune to fit the picture, and fails miserably. . Cavernous sounds well up, Rick Wakeman style, and inappropriately. The organ does what a good soundtrack should not, it calls attention to itself, over the action. So this is cheesy On the plus side, the Acid water was an interesting display of originality, what was it doing here? A similar device was used in "The Life of Pi."(2012) The film constantly challenges common sense, and in that it is consistent. that is why the film makes compelling viewing. You find yourself wondering why the girls are still wearing jewelry so late in, why the men don't make weapons, or at least carry sticks. Why they don't find a strategy to fend off the attacks, Nothing nunca, none of the above. I give it Four out of Ten "Inane" Stars

Tromafreak Why 1920? Who said that would be a good Idea? Why does nothing about this movie make sense? Was this movie meant to be seen by humans? I have some more questions regarding Attack Of The Beast Creatures. But I'm certainly not holding out for any answers. I'm not sure what I was expecting from this one, but the type of peculiar offered here kind of caught me off guard. Now I've seen a lot of interesting/unique/obscure/terrible Z-grade cinema in my day. Hundreds, in fact, but something tells me this one's one of a kind. The ineptness of it all. The fakeness of those... things!! But really, what I find most peculiar about Attack Of The Beast Creatures is that I actually kinda loved it. We begin with the survivors of a sunken ship, who barely make it to an uncharted Island. This island appears to be quiet, and empty, so their only concern now is to quickly find water and nourishment, any water they manage to find turns out to be acid (the bad kind) and on top of that, this island isn't so empty after all. This Island is the home of hundreds of vicious, little fake-looking/flesh-eating creatures, who have recently discovered the walking buffet, who have unknowingly invaded their territory. That's right, Beast Creatures. Nothing, and I mean nothing about these damn things say "I'm a living being." Just a bunch of little dolls with red skin, and white eyes, that people behind the camera toss towards the cast, who unconvincingly pretend the things are biting them. despite being alive, the cast is even less convincing than the Beast Creatures. I don't know if they thought people had brain-damage in 1920, or these people were actually brain-damaged, in that case, I suppose we should be impressed, other than that, I don't know, there's just something a little "off" about everything in this one. Kinda like in Troll 2. If you haven't seen that one, see it!! nevermind the first one. Anyway, I only speak negatively of this the beast creatures because the negativity is more than obvious. It's all in good fun. The truth is, complete and utter cluelessness of Attack of the Beast Creatures intrigues me to no end. And it's hilarious. Yeah, I'm one of those people. Can't help it. As soon as I read about it, I knew it would be amazing. Lucky for me, I still have a VCR. How about a DVD release? Maybe with some Joe Bob Briggs audio commentary. I think that would be keen. If hearing of the awkward ineptness of this freak-of-nature doesn't scare you off, then you're probably feeling a little curious. If that be the case, go with it. Definitely worth the search, and the price. You won't be sorry... Well, maybe a little. 8/10

Tikkin In my search for cool low-budget horror films I have come across tons of crap, so it makes a refreshing change to find one this good. Attack of the Beast Creatures is another one of those low-budget obscurities that'll never be very well known, but will be lapped up by bad movie lovers everywhere.A more suitable name for this might have been Attack of the Tree Dolls, because that's what these so-called "beast creatures" really are. They live in trees, and boy are they ferocious! They run in such a way that is absolutely hilarious. The film never threatens to get boring, although slightly verges on the tedious towards the end. There are many excellent scenes that more than make up for any faults. My favourite is when the delirious man thinks the woman's hair in front of him is one of the creatures, and we see a dolls face that looks back at him and "laughs". He then starts attacking the woman, runs off and melts away in an acid pool. Another great scene is when you can see the creatures' eyes in the dark. First one pair, then another... then there's loads of them. There's also a great scene when the tree creatures are huddled around some sort of statue that looks like a giant cracker, sadly this is only shown briefly. The musical score is also good and adds to the atmosphere. So far I think there's only bootlegs available - keeping checking ebay and you may be able to find one. There's also a website devoted to the film, where you can buy a DVD or poster: http://www.beastcreatures.com.

capkronos Despite what you may have read or heard, this silly low-budgeter is a great rental despite whatever shortcomings it has. However, you might have an impossible time trying to track down a tape because this has been out of circulation for years.Filmed in 1983, this concerns the struggle for survival among a small group of shipwreck survivors on a secluded island (really inland Fairfield, Connecticut, where this was filmed). A seemingly innocent water stream is actually full of acid as one poor parched man soon finds out, and worse, the island is home a cult of small, killer, TRILOGY OF TERROR-style dolls. The dolls have red faces, long black hair, glow-in-the-dark eyes and sharp pointy teeth. Their jaws open so they can screech and their arms move up and down when they scurry through the woods, but other than that, they are hilariously immobile.I don't want to get too much into the story, but some of the assault/ambush techniques devised by the little critters are very amusing and the low-level POV camera-work and eerie music score service the entertaining story very well. This film is a blast!Score: 6 out of 10