Assault of the Sasquatch

2010 "New Territory, Fresh Prey!"
Assault of the Sasquatch
3.6| 1h15m| R| en| More Info
Released: 01 March 2010 Released
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Synopsis

When a merciless bear poacher is caught and arrested deep in the woods of a state park, he and his truck are taken to a neglected precinct in the heart of a dying city. Unbeknown-st to the authorities, the impounded truck holds a deadly cargo in the form of the legendary Sasquatch. Now, stuck in an unfamiliar world, the creature will let nothing and no one stop it from coming face-to-face with the unscrupulous man who ruthlessly ripped it from its environment. Taking an inventive and action packed approach, "Sasquatch Assault" breaths new and exciting life into the immortal legend of Bigfoot.

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gavin6942 When a merciless bear poacher is caught and arrested deep in the woods of a state park, he and his truck are taken to a neglected precinct in the heart of a dying city.There is some attempt at humor here, such as the nerds approaching the prostitute. In fact, their very presence in the film seems like a running attempt to create comic relief. Members of the Sasquatch Society? Really? I notice some people have criticized the "gorilla suit" the Sasquatch wears. And, frankly, if you have a Bigfoot in a movie, you probably should show him as little as possible. However, they did a pretty decent job here... and the CGI they used on the facial expressions was not bad (which is shocking after you see how terrible the CGI on the airplane is). This film is bad, but I have seen much worse.
FieCrier Poachers in a bear preserve capture Bigfoot, who ends up being transported to an almost- abandoned police station, where he wreaks havoc.On the "good" side, Cristina Santiago is smoking hot, there's some brief nudity from another actress, and some of the gore is decent and at times funny, as with the impalement by "Dead End" sign.On the bad side, the video is of a poor quality which doesn't work well in low-light conditions resulting in a hazy look, and most of the movie is set outdoors at night or in dim interiors. Additionally, the comic relief of Don and Murph is extremely bad. They're very annoying characters, particularly Don who is a grossly overweight man-child who breathlessly shrieks and yells constantly. It's an unfunny shtick he's been doing on YouTube for years, and it's no funnier here than there. Padding out the running time, there are some scenes where the two go around asking people if they're seen the sasquatch, which they have not.The sasquatch has quite a bad costume, and his behavior is hard to figure. Sometimes he attacks while unprovoked, sometimes he wants to peep on or kidnap young women, at other times rescue them, at other times fight them. Sometimes he'll kill, while at other times he'll just knock somebody out or ignore them.I guess on the whole the movie is fairly amusing, but it isn't very funny and it certainly isn't good.
luxmissus Three hunters are out poaching for bear when they fortuitously trap a sasquatch. Terry Drake (Kevin Shea) seeing his monetary ship come in phones a mysterious collector to tell him he's finally tracked down what the collector is looking for. Though the sasquatch kills his companions, Drake manages to corral it into a truck.Meanwhile, two game wardens (Greg Nutcher and Cristina Santiago) hear the goings-on and investigate, arresting Drake and driving the truck into the middle of downtown. Naturally the sasquatch escapes and does his sasquatch thing.Hoo-boy. I can't decide which is worse, the acting or the writing or the "special effects." The two leads are actually okay and might have even been acceptable, if they'd had coherent writing to work with. Nutcher is decent and Santiago palatable. There is even hope for Sarah Ahearn who plays Nutcher's daughter Jessica. Shea, however, chews scenery as if it was beef jerky.The storyline makes little sense ... if I am generously assuming there is a plot and seems to involve some flashbacks with little context and little integration to the rest of the plot. I understand the writer might have been attempting a horror-comedy. Well he failed.Don't even get me started on the special effects. The sasquatch is clearly a man in a modified gorilla suit and there wasn't even much modification as other reviewers have mentioned.The only reason it didn't get one star from me is that some of the actors were clearly doing their best with the material and direction they were given.Even if you love really bad movies as much as I do, skip this one.
im_goode What is there to really say about this? If you go into this movie expecting anything but bottom of the barrel acting, plot, and effects; I'd recommend seeking help. This movie is trying to be one of the self-aware B-horror movies, constantly poking fun at itself, but if fails so miserably that all of it's jokes are funny for the wrong reasons. Pretty much every scene in this movie is funny for the wrong reason.But hey, you're watching a 'SyFy' movie. You know what this is. It's a cheesy cliché movie shoveled out with a bare minimum budget to try to make a quick buck. I actually enjoyed this movie, but that's because I love poking fun at horrendously bad movies such as this with my friends. So if you're a bad movie fan like me, this is a somewhat fun watch, otherwise this movie is total garbage.2/10