dukeakasmudge ***Spoilers Ahead, Maybe?*** The only thing memorable about this movie was the opening murder scene.It was straight up brutal & after watching it, I wondered if I should've just turned it off then & there but as you already figured out, I didn't.The rest of the movie is forgettable.After you watch Machete Joe, you'll probably forget everything you watched in a couple hours.Oh yeah, the only other thing you might remember is the way Scooter was killed & dragged off (Gory & Brutal) Why did they have to kill off Scooter? He was funny & the best thing about the movie.Anywayz...... Was it just me or did everybody's voice seem like they were dubbed in English? Weird.I can't recommend anybody go see this movie unless nothing else good is on & you're BORED out of your mind like I was.Most importantly, ONLY watch Machete Joe if you can see it for free.If you have to pay or are thinking about paying to watch it, give that $$$ to me!!!

eddyhate this movie is the worst movie you can ever watch the only reason i'm sure some reviews give 10 as a rating it's because it's an almost all black casting and let me tell you they took the worst of all the black actors that are out there they act worse than samuel L. jackson in "snakes on a plane" and that's pretty hard to beat and the movie is even worse than "snakes on a plane" and the 3.1 rating is completely false no one can watch this movie and think it's good the story is bad the actors are bad the SFX are bad the camera work is bad damn they most of meant -3.1 stars that would make more sense if that's the best movie an almost all black casting and probably crew can make please don't do it again you make the wayans bros look bad if you want to lose an hour and a half of your life go buy a bottle of prune juice you'll have a better time with that than watching this shflickt

toyman1967 I haven't written a review for a film in quite a while but after watching this movie I feel compelled to do so!! I have NOTHING good to say about this movie at all!! The big stars of this film are Art Evans and Ernie Hudson but they only appear in this film a TOTAL of about 5 minutes COMBINED. The acting is horrendous, some of the worst I've EVER seen and I've seen MANY bad-acted movies. I would even put the movie "The Room" above this one in terms of better acted bad movies. There are NO redeeming qualities about this movie so I'm going to stop now because I just realized that I'm wasting my time reviewing a film that ALREADY wasted my time!!! Just stay away from Machete Joe!!!!

slatromhsiloof Anyone who would give this movie 10 stars is either part of the production crew or severely brain damaged. This film has no redeeming qualities whatsoever. Do yourself a favor and avoid this steaming pile of feces. Two grade school children with a webcam could put together a better production than this. I've seen videos on U tube that were far more entertaining. I would imagine they pulled the script from a Universal Studios port-a-potty, then enticed a few homeless people to act in the film by offering them day old donuts as payment. The rest of the budget probably went to hookers and blow. Take a hint producers of this turd: If you are going to make a movie this horrible, you had better switch to pornography as those movies don't depend on stories or acting ability. Sorry for spoiling your scam of throwing up fake 10 star reviews in an effort to sucker people into paying money to watch your horrible waste of time. If you want to put up these fake reviews you should probably put up a more believable 4 stars, as even that is far more than this movie deserves. Just so you know, I saw this movie FOR FREE and it was turned off after the first ten minutes. It was that bad.