Sam Panico n the eve of the opening of a new mall, a shadowy man steals a crossbow and kills a security guard. It's hushed up, as so many people are losing their minds that such an amazing mall is open in their town. It's probably only the eight mall in Sharman Oaks )the movie was actually shot at the Sherman Oaks Galleria, Westfield Promenade and Valencia Studios), so this is big news.Melody Austin (Kari Kennell Whitman, Playboy Playmate of the Month February, 1988) and Suzie (The Adventures of Ford Fairlaine and the girl at the craps table in Empire Records) are excited to get good jobs there. That's when we learn that the killer is Eric (oh yeah, his name is in the subtitle, as if we're supposed to know who Eric and why he wants revenge), Suzie's supposedly dead boyfriend, who was lost in the fire that paved the way for the mall. Yep, his family wouldn't sell and damn progress, now everyone is dead and Suzie has moved on, literally working for minimum wage on the ashes of the man she once had sex with in a room that oddly enough has a fireplace. I've been in plenty of houses — I'm not bragging, just stating fact — and I have never seen a teenager have a fireplace in their room before. Maybe it's trust issues. Perhaps it's just ridiculous.To hide his face, Eric slices a mannequin head in half to form the traditional Phantom mask. Anyone that screws with Suzie dies, while he continues to leave her gifts — her favorite flowers, which triggers the above mentioned fireplace fornication flashback; playing her favorite song; even killing Justin (Tom Fridley, Jason Lives: Friday the 13th Part VI), the owner of the mall's annoying son when he tries to come on too strong to Melody.Oh that owner of the mall? He's played by Jonathan Goldsmith, the original Most Interesting Man in the World. Yes, even hyperbolic ad pitchmen had to pay the bills at some point. He's aided and abetted by Morgan Fairchild, who plays Mayor Karen Wilton. Did you know that in the swinging 70s Morgan was held against her will on two separate occasions? Here she acts like she doesn't know what's going on until late in the picture — turns out she's behind it all and pays the price by being lofting off the third level of the mall and impaled. It's a wonderful death, as Frank Miller Batman would mutter under his breath.

The Yeti 'Phantom of the mall'. Okay, i'll see what it's like. Hey, that was pretty good. These were my words when I saw this good movie. The acting isn't up to much but the brilliant killings and loads of action make up for it! There are car chases and explosions! The story is really just an inspiration from the 'Phantom of the Opera'. Eric Matthews is the Phantom who is in the mall. Quite obvious hey? He tries to tell his girlfriend that he is still alive by leaving messages all over the mall. Suzie and her friends soon start to believe it but Suzie turns the Phantom down and chaos ensues. It has some good intensity and laughs but really it is good overall. 7 out of 10.'Spoiler'= Watch out for the scene where the Phantom throws Morgan Fairchild through the mall window about 3 floors up!

bigpappa1--2 A phantom protects a lovely and lonely teenage girl from harm and eliminates all those that caused him to be deformed. Sounds as if it's a can't miss premise, but this is nearly worthless on all levels. An uninspired presentation with awful acting, direction, plotting, and effects. Features plenty of gratuitous nudity though for all you horror fans. My rating: 2 out of 10. Features an early appearance by Pauly Shore.

drunk-2 Though I suppose it would be well possible to make a better movie about a shopping mall version of the Phantom of the opera, to the best of my knowledge no one ever has. Unless you count "Gremlins 2: The New Batch", on account of the fact that it featured a Phantom themed Gremlin. I don't count this though, so let's move on. Not only is "P.O.M" (as I shall now call it) the best movie ever to place the Phantom in a mall, but it is also the greatest (IE: only tolerable) Polly Shore movie ever made. This movie being made in 1988 before Polly Shore was famous enough to be allowed to act like Polly Shore in a film. Another nice touch is the fact that the front doors of the Mall are labelled "Mall Entrance." Really I though they were the entrance to something other than the building they're attached to like the magical world Narnia or something. Anyway the real draw of this film is it awesome musical theme. It's reminiscent of a better day when almost all movies had a rock'n song about their plot at the end, under Hollywood's "well it worked for Ghostbusters" policy. The song boldly dares to use such controversial terms as "Boobs" and "Retard". Point being if your not doing something productive to uplift the human spirt (which if you're reading my review on "The Phantom of the Mall" you and I both know you aren't) rent and watch this hidden jewel of cinema and make Mr. Polly "The Free World's Punching Bag" Shore a couple pennies richer. Go ahead, I dare ya!