Josh Myers (myrothe) This was the worst movie I've ever seen. The beginning was childish (and gross) and was totally unrelated to the film. The budget is beyond low. A guy in a 25 cent rubber monkey mask?, scenes shot in someones basement?I thought it might be good as a parody, but its not even smart enough to be that. Basiclly its a bunch of people (whos maturity stopped around age 12) trying to throw as many dick jokes as they can into a non existent plot.I mean this looks like a video a bunch of drunk teens made on a Friday night. I cant see enjoying a second of this unless you are seriously immature, and drunk. This is like a 3rd grade fart joke told over and over.Not even good enough to be enjoyed as a bad movie. Pathetic and shameful.

Barbecue The highlight of this film is in the first minutes, where Teen Ape, while getting head from a perky anonymous skank, accidentally ejaculates across the room into the mouth of our narrator, who then proceeds to dribble what looks like skim milk into said skank's eager mouth, in what has to be the worst attempt at faking a "snowballing" scene in film history. Unfortunately, the ape-groupie departs, and things go rapidly downhill from there. Some of Teen Ape's obnoxious crude sexual commentary would be funny, if it were not so badly mumbled and incoherent. There are a lot of in-jokes and winks, but nothing funnier than what you'd see in a high school annual. The juxtaposition of medieval dialog with pseudo-gangsta hip-hop slang falls flat, and the crass dialog is too tediously delivered to be funny. One of the great things about truly dreadful movies is that the actors, while dreadful, are somewhat sincere. This cast doesn't suffer from such a misconception however. With a few exceptions, they know they suck, and don't seem to care. The result is more boredom than exploitation. Bright spots: Anonymous Slattern, Elegant Elliott, the Elf Ho', and the Wandering Swordsman.Funniest line: "...and my f**king hand turned mortal!"The Goblin KingIf you're a fan of low-life cinema a la Troma Team, and you expect something similar from this, you'll be disappointed. It's terrible, but not so terrible that it's fun to watch. A good movie to recommend to someone you're mad at.

jr42602 Easily the best looking Chris Seaver movie to date. Egg Salad still has a laugh every other second like previous productions, but without so much sexual perversity (save the awesome opening scene). The acting is decent, the production design has some thought put into it and the make-up effects are outstanding. This riff on LOTR is no-budget, which is part of its charm, as are all of Chris Seaver's movies. Finally, here is a guy who chose to DO SOMETHING instead of sitting on his couch wishing he had the money to make a picture. Every one of this man's movies is proof, if you want to be a filmmaker, then get off your butt and do it. You don't need money! Just a camera, some friends, and a sense of humor. Instant art! I will be looking forward to the next LBP release with great anticipation. And maybe one day I'll be able to see one in a theater! With teenape as my date!

BHorrorWriter Good times and a good cast make this film a good watch. Chris Seaver turns his attention from Horror/Comedy to Fantasy/Comedy. "Quest" is a good film with solid acting from the likes of Jesse Green, Tim Ekkebus, Seaver himself and all included in the cast...With the exceptions of Elegant Elliott Offen...Scary!!Chris actually had me sit in on a Fan Commentary track to be released later this year by Tempe. I can't wait for the extras on the disc. This movie is funny, gross, silly, and a bloody good time. Filled to the brim will all the craziness one expects from LBP!8 out of 10