WhySoSeriousssss All of the positive reviews must be friends of the filmmaker because this movie is a pile of bat guano. Predictable story, horrible photography, sloppy nonsensical editing and it has some of the worst acting/writing I've ever been subjected to sit through. It feels like the first feature of a film school graduate. After doing a little research and finding out who this filmmaker is, it's no wonder he'd produce something so tasteless and pathetic. He's got 4 features to his name and this is the first one released. Good job! You're winning at your career!I expect literal SH*T like this from young filmmakers. Not men who look like they are a Fred Dursts older brother.

ASouthernHorrorFan "Sanctuary, Quite A Conundrum" is Thomas L. Phillips is the vows written for the unlikely marriage between trash cinema and horror."Sanctuary, Quite A Conundrum" follows a night of partying and sexing that turns into a cluster-f*ck of brutality and survival, when a disturbing event brings the party crashing down.This story is nothing short of amazing, and brilliant. At first "Sactuary, Quite A Conundrum" kicks off with cliché overhypes that I was sure were going to annoy me. However ten minutes into the witty banter between the two lead female characters I was hooked. The face-paced dialog, timing and delivery of the actresses is spot on. The characters are an updated Valley Girl persona that feels relevant to a contemporary setting. Plus them b*tches was funny as hell! "Quite A Conundrum" starts off as a light, campy satire that, when the scene turns sour, gets dark real fast. Phillips is as a modern day John Hughes. I felt the sudden sickening feeling hit as the story goes from one of light to total horror. His ability to both blend a satirical comedic air with an equal air of terror, without dragging the story down, is amazing. I felt conflicted the whole time. There is some completely nightmarish horror that takes place in the film, but there is some humor that cannot be denied. The story gets tense, then light-ish, before getting even more tense. "Quite A Conundrum" just offers a superb story from start to finish.The special effects are the standard for a film driven more by high drama and basic action sequences. The kill scenes stay pretty equal to micro-budget level but come off, through great direction and cinematography, as high production value scenes. The blood and deaths are sudden, blunt force moments that catch you in the headlights of a horrific moment taking place before your eyes. Even then the ability of the cast to effortlessly sway between such dark material and the lighter humorous stuff is a show to the casts' talent. The soundtrack is pretty stellar. A mix of thriller sound effects and contemporary tunes offer a mix of suspenseful tension and terror, balanced by almost MTV video quality atmospheric slow mo situations. There are small moments that seem a bit contrived but none that altar the entertainment value or overall energy of the film. But really there has to be, honestly the fact that based on Thomas L. Phillips writing style, it is nothing short of amazing that a lot of this film doesn't fail. "Sactuary, Quite A Conundrum" is a masterpiece and instant cult classic that everyone should see-not just horror and camp cinema fans!

filmbizarro If you've missed our love for Thomas L. Phillips's "Special Dead", then you've either not paid attention, or you started visiting out site recently. It's a bit of a favorite over here, especially when it comes to mid-to-late 00's zombie flicks and onwards. Phillips has since made a couple of other movies that have gone unnoticed by us (perhaps due to the genres), but with "Quite a Conundrum" it was Phillips himself who crawled out of the whole and made us aware of it. Free from the splattery handicap violence and zombies, "Quite a Conundrum" offers just as many strong flavors but in a different way.The movie is set in the house of two sisters (or rather, their parents). The sisters are Mimi and Kylene. Where Mimi, the older one, is a slutty party girl, Kylene is young, reasonable and prefers taking it slow. Mimi's friend Tabitha is about on the same page as Mimi, where it's all about having fun (and embarrassing Kylene). Earlier that day, Mimi slept with a fat, old man who works with her dad and quite ruthlessly called him a loser. Later that night, she's invited to the friend of Tabitha's boyfriend, and joining the party is Kylene's Christian born boyfriend Harris. Many names, I know, but bare with me. When the girls and guys are in the midst of their party that night, the old man returns. And he wants an apology from Mini. One that he's not getting, which leads to him shooting himself then and there. Enter chaos, angst, curiosity, wackiness, twists and simple, mindless entertainment - the main things "Quite a Conundrum" has to offer.You see, the plot in "Quite a Conundrum" is one of the things that I am split about. It does quite push itself away from logic (let's just say it's a night of TOTAL bad luck). It trips itself over now and then, but somehow it's fine. "Quite a Conundrum" is wacked out enough, with eccentric personalities leading the way, that even though it tackles certain plot points in a strange way, by the end of it all we're enjoying the ride. The ending is hard to explain without spoiling it, but it was really fantastic. It brings out an emotion that the rest of the movie lacked: it spent its time being witty and crude without much remorse, and the finale goes the opposite direction. It snaps us back to reality (even though the movie didn't venture far from it to begin with) by being extremely, almost over-the-top, emotional over a past action. It really struck a chord with me, filling me with an emptiness that lingered through the end credits. I don't know what Thomas L. Phillips' plans with the ending were, but I found that to be the part that made the entire movie worth it.The acting in the movie is hard to judge. The characters are supposed to be a bit "too much" and that's hard to handle. But sometimes I think it's also in the hands of the actors. There are a few moments that just don't work. The characters get annoying, babbly and a bit too hip. Most of the time it's good, though, and I especially fell for Erin Cline (who I also referred to as cute in my review of "Date Night" - I'll stand by that here as well). Her quirkiness fits perfectly, where some other actors' might not. She has her lows too, but the majority of the film is held up nicely much because of her and Emily Rogers. Emily Rogers plays Kylene and she works as a steady rock to hold while things get messy around her. Her character is not free from change, but she handles them perfectly. I'm not discrediting any of the actors in particular, they all have their ups and downs here."Quite a Conundrum" won't please everyone, but those who do enjoy it might be finding their future cult classic. Without being very close to either, it's taking large pieces of great variety: plot reminiscent of "Very Bad Things", indie film chatting like "Clerks", twists-and-turns like "Scream" and an ending like an art-house movie. I'm aware that another review brought up both "Clerks" and "Scream", I'm not trying to steal here - it's actually the closest you can describe it as, while it still remains vastly different. No doubt, Phillips' has matured since the fun "Special Dead" but has not left his indie ways. It's not without some big flaws, but it won me over completely.More reviews at FilmBizarro.com

Keith Bailey Quite A Conundrum is one of those rare things in film these days, a thriller that actually thrills. Where most commercial thrillers from the major motion picture companies are dull and formulaic, Thomas Phillips thriller is full of surprises. Every time I thought I knew where the film was heading it took a new unexpected twist that sent it rocketing off in a new direction. It begins as a comedy that soon turns dark, and then darker still. Just when you think you have the characters all figured out, they do something totally out of left field that leaves you wondering who they really are. If you enjoy the thriller genre this film is a must see experience, and one I can't wait to add to my DVD collection.