donaldricco Ok, the movie itself isn't very good, but the concept is pretty dang nifty! Steve Martin is a noir style detective involved in the Carlotta case, and Rachel Ward is the holy smokes gorgeous dame with the best quote of the film, "If you need me, just call. You know how to dial, don't you? You just put your finger in the hole and make tiny little circles."! (try THAT on an iPhone!) And then, bring on the old Hollywood noir classic actors and actresses! The people that are spliced into this picture "act" with Martin, and as they are from other movies, they sort of drive the plot of this movie all over the place. But it's fun, and at times, quite brilliant! Bogart is in it the most, which only seems fitting, and I got a smile each time he came on the screen! Through in the bullet sucking, and the pajamas, and it was a decent way to spend an hour and a half!

secondtake Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid (1982)I'm a film noir buff. Fanatic. Devotee. So I really loved how this movie was made--not what happens in it, but the main trick of inserting real film noir clips with new footage starring Steve Martin. When it first happens (with Alan Ladd) it's like, what? Is this for real? And then it keeps happening, usually with easy cuts where the original noir shows someone on the phone and it can cut to Martin talking on the phone, or with two people on each side of a room or a door, the camera changing positions and allowing the cuts from one world to the other. In a few special cases they get fancier, like the Cary Grant insert--you'll have to see about that. (I just corrected the wikipedia page on this note.)I also think the director (and co-writer) Rob Reiner makes the new footage (which is 90 percent of the movie) take on an authentic black and white feel--heavy shadows, moving camera, and so on. Martin of course is a somewhat comic version of a film noir hero or anti-hero (this movie is a spoof overall) but he's got more presence than you might expect. It's smart and respectful and well done.What it lacks is a genuine plot. The many various clips require such somersaulting to work them into the script, any hope of an overarching drama is dashed. I found myself watching just to watch, and to wonder who would get included next. Martin's sidekick played by Rachel Ward is a bit drab, too, if pretty (she was a model) and is for some reason very English, a big monkeywrench in the film noir universe. Steve Martin deserves some admiration for pulling this off. There is not only a filming continuity needed but one of acting and delivery, which he masters. Now if only he and Reiner had a plot to carry the thing through as a movie, and not just a big, sophisticated, beautiful gag.

kenjha Detective investigates the disappearance of a cheese scientist. It's a gimmick but this is perhaps the most stellar cast ever assembled: Bogart, Bergman, Cagney, Crawford, Davis, Douglas, Grant, Gardner, Ladd, Lancaster, MacMurray, Stanwyck, etc. It's an amusing gimmick, but unfortunately there is little else here to hold one's interest. The writers labored so hard to cleverly incorporate the vintage clips that they forgot to write a story that has any kind of sustained narrative or wit. The jokes are so lame that most of them are not even worthy of groans. Mostly, one is left longing to watch the films from which clips are teasingly utilized here.

T Y This demented one-of-a-kind comedy works best if you've seen 4 or 5 noir/hard boiled detective movies. Because at that point you begin to notice the plots become conflated and entangled. The gag is that with a bit of thought you can splice 20 of them together and get something pretty similar. The resulting mystery and detection results in a story that doesn't make a whole lot of sense, but then lots of noirs don't make much sense (The Big Sleep, Somewhere in the Night, Dark Passage). For noir, the tone, the striking compositions and the moral code are much more important.Whoever pieced this together had a lot of fun with it. There's quite a range of different comedy to enjoy. Some of the funniest bits just involve the new footage (Martin's bleeding knees). Some of them are absurd/revisionist (Rachel Ward can hear Martin's voice-over narration) A whole lot of them involve the absurd plot lines introduced by the old footage, that then have to be integrated. Some running jokes are duds ("adjusting your breasts" Bogart and his ties). Others are awfully funny ("That's never gonna heal!") It also has some hysterical visuals (Martin's balletic dodge of Alan Ladd's bullet). Some of the patches are funny; Martin is constantly correcting people when they get his name wrong (because they're talking to other characters in other films) The two best comic moments involve a unique way to make coffee, and Martin's hopeless, post-rejection assessment of women. All of this is ten floors above the usual Adam Sandler dross.If an academic ever gave this its due as the first instance of meta, or at least an example of intertextuality, it would have more respect. If you've seen it more than once, it's interesting to see why - not just plot points - but visuals have to be introduced, sometimes quite smoothly. i.e. Martin gets drugged and offers to put on his pajama top (over his suit) because it's needed to match the schmo he's doubling in the next vintage clip. Too funny. You don't need to think hard at all to enjoy this, but if you like thoughtful movies, this offers a bonus level to consider.On the minus side, Reni Santoni is irritating and certifiably untalented. He doesn't deliver a single laugh.