gavinshapiro
I honestly don't know where to begin when reviewing a movie as pathetic as Ernest Goes to Africa. Aside from two or three good laughs dispersed throughout the film, there is nothing positive about this hour-and-a-half waste of time and life. It is incredible that someone was able to round up a group of people willing to act, film, and edit this piece of trash, and even more incredible that this is the eighth installment in the Ernest series.During the opening credits of the movie, we see Ernest posing next to various African objects, such as wooden masks and the heads of African animals, making faces and gestures that would probably make most 3rd graders laugh. This opening scene gives the viewer a taste of Ernest's frequent attempts at humor, and demonstrates how his comedy falls flat 95% of the time.The first thing that really hit me about this movie is how bad the acting is. Everyone in the film is a typical C-movie actor, but Linda Kash stands out as especially terrible. She is the epitome of overacting; all of her lines are delivered with shockingly inhuman enthusiasm that you'd find only in a middle school play. Most high school theater students probably could have replaced these actors and delivered a more powerful performance. Jim Varney at least displays some comedic ability every now and then, but for the majority of the movie he just acts like a complete retard, trying to be humorous by making stupid faces and speaking in different voices.Ernest Goes to Africa begins in Africa, where an archaeologist has stolen two priceless gems from an African tribe. The gems then make their way back to the United States, where an unidentified man is seen running from several henchmen through a flea market. He hides them in a bucket of "two for a dollar" items, and then runs from the scene. Ernest is looking for a gift to buy for Rene, a waitress he likes, so he goes to the flea market and of course buys the priceless gems. He later takes them back to his house, paints them, and glues them together to make a yo-yo. He gives the yo-yo to Rene and she explains that they can never be together because he is just an average shmoe, and she wants a man of adventure. Rene and Ernest are tracked down by the henchmen, and are then brought to Africa to be kept as prisoners.Most of the movie really doesn't make sense. Once Ernest is in Africa, he falls out of the truck that they are carrying him in and lands in a river. In the next scene, we see him as a Hindu servant named "Hey You." His skin is dark and he is wearing a loin cloth. At first, I thought Jim Varney was playing another role in the film in addition to Ernest, but I immediately recognized Ernest's idiocy once Hey You began to speak.Another scene that sticks out in my mind as being completely ridiculous is the car chase scene in the African wilderness. Rene and Ernest have taken an ostrich farmer's truck and are being chased by the henchmen. Driving at about twenty miles per hour on a fairly straight road, both henchmen are shooting at Ernest, who is in the back of the ostrich farmer's truck. Ernest, on the other hand, is throwing ostrich eggs at the henchmen and their driver. The henchmen never hit Ernest once during the five minute chase, but Ernest is able to fend them off by hitting them and their driver in the face, making their car swerve off the road and explode in a giant column of smoke. I should also add that Ernest is slingshotting the eggs, two at a time, from a large bra.The set design is also incredibly poor in this movie. There is a large portion of the film in which Rene and Ernest are walking in Africa, trying to find civilization. During their hike, we see them walking through fields and jungles, which probably could have been shot anywhere in the United States. The fields are simply plain grassy fields, with no indication whatsoever of being anywhere near Africa (they could have at least digitally added some African trees in the background), and the jungles look like the woods of rural Connecticut with papier mâchè skulls, vines, and thorns hanging from trees. According to IMDb.com, the film was actually shot in South Africa, but I still wouldn't believe that at all.The movie goes on and on, Ernest joke after Ernest joke. The rest of the movie doesn't really make any sense either; the African tribesmen all speak English for some reason, and Ernest is later challenged to a "Battle of Truth" by the lead henchman, who is suddenly dressed in an outfit that resembles that of a ninja, yet also somewhat resembles that of a bondage submissive. The henchman has a table of axes, swords, knives, and maces before him, while Ernest has a table with a sandwich, a teddy bear, and a few other worthless items. However, Ernest wins the battle and somehow ends up saving the day.Overall, this movie is painful to watch. I couldn't handle it in one sitting; I had to stop halfway through and do something productive for a few hours to compensate for the brain cells lost while trying to appreciate Varney's humor. They should really put a Surgeon's General Warning on the box to let people know that they will in fact be slightly more retarded upon finishing this movie. I would have to say that out of all the movies I have ever seen, none comes close to being as pitiable as Ernest Goes to Africa.
Nick Dets
I saw this film when it came out in '97. I was in third grade at the time and was attracted to a new Ernest adventure. Even at age nine, I found it an unfunny, complete waste of time. I wasn't a hard kid to please- nine year olds usually aren't, but it was a bad sign when lovable and hilarious Jim Varney as Ernest P. Whorrol couldn't get much of a reaction of me. Last Thanksgiving, I was looking through the TV guide and found that "Ernest Goes to Africa" was on USA at two in the morning. It was a lonely, secluded slot and I decided to give it some company. Then fifteen, I just wanted a smile and an hour and half of entertainment. My judgement hadn't changed in five years and I constantly flipped channels, but for whatever reason this one had me coming back. You see, there is some kind of odd magic about this film that drew me in for some reason. Maybe it's Varney's presence...maybe its the wonder of generic, late night USA, but whatever it is, I would actually recommend watching "Ernest Goes to Africa". The story is predictably trite. Owing oh so much to `Raiders of the Lost Ark' the plot involves the theft of priceless jewels, the Eyes of Agolie, being stolen from a worshipping tribe by ruthless archaeologist Mr. Thompson. They inadvertently end up at a flea market where Ernest finds them and makes a yo-yo out of them. (Quick criticism, these jewels look completely like plastic…it seems like director John Cherry III didn't even try). With Ernest's beloved Rene, a waitress who is `sick of hometown ordinary ‘shmoes', he is kidnapped out of suspicion and ends up fleeing Thompson and his goons in a series of scenes that become more and more unwatchable in a downward spiral. There are some honestly terrible scenes that will no doubt repel you. It starts off on the wrong foot with a desperate opener where Varney tries and tries with his large amount of comedic skill to bring out laughs with his reactions to different African artifacts, but the scene fatally doesn't work. Jim is brilliant at Ernest, but in this unrelated beginning he feels like some goofy friend trying to bring out a laugh when your in a mood incapable of letting you smile. The film has even more to complain about. It is shot on a pretty cheap-looking video that may turn you off right off the bat. It seems every actor present besides Varney is either a bad one, or just an irritating one- especially Linda Kash as Rene. The traditional Ernest gags like the cranky granny have finally become tried thanks to Cherry's dull direction this time. He has a noticeable boundary between live-action cartoon and adventure film, and it is painful when frequently crossed. This is by any definition an uneven film due to this boundary. OK enough smushing this film; that is too easy of a task. Liking it is a hard one, but I challenge you to attempt it. This film has a great asset: how much fun it is to hate it. If you don't feel the compelling magic I felt to watch it, then I recommend it for this pleasurable bashing, even if you are not a cynic. The bottom line here, `Ernest Goes to Africa' starts of catastrophic, flattens even more in the middle and has an unpredictably unsatisfying ending, but if this comedic adventure isn't somehow an escape from boring old life, then I don't know what is. I recommend renting this bad film, staying up late, and letting it take you out of your head for an hour and a half.
Clouds-3
I saw this on WAM last night and had to see it. As another viewer said, there were flashes of pure brilliance so in contrast with the bad plot. Basically all the Ernest humor was really good. Anything having to do with Africa was bad. Sometimes, it wasn't clear whether the filmmakers knew the difference between Africa and India, as Indian accents abounded. Jamie Bartlett was also an excellent villain. Somehow seeing him yell the standard, "You fools!" at his henchmen gave a kind of satisfaction you don't normally get from a B-movie villain. Regardless, it was an Ernest movie, thus stupid by definition. If you like Varney's characters (Ernest/Hey You/etc[you shouldn't know about all of them]) then you should definitely see this movie.
