Paul Andrews Universal Soldiers is set on an isolated island where a US military instillation named Camp Jacob has been used as the site for a research programme to develop the ultimate weapon with enhanced fighting & survival capabilities, several prototype cyborg soldiers have been created. Unfortunately they have run amok killing most of the human soldiers leaving only a handful to try & fight them off as the enhanced soldiers kill the survivors off one-by-one. The only hope is to radio for assistance & an air-strike but getting to the main computer & the equipment needed involves a long trek across open ground with the enhanced cyborg soldiers in pursuit...Directed by Griff Furst this is yet another rip-off by The Asylum who take a popular Hollywood film, slightly change the title & make the worst low budget film imaginable to maximize profits (they really don't spend anything on the crap they make) & hope innocent people like you will be fooled into thinking it's a sequel, connected to the Hollywood film or is the Hollywood film. Take Universal Soldiers for instance, obviously made to capitalize on the JCVD & Dolph Lundgren sci-fi action film Universal Soldier (1992) the two titles are almost identical with the exception of an 'S'. That's how this company works, at least the makers of the rip-off films from the 70's & 80's were interested in still producing decent entertainment but The Asylum just churn out crap. Universal Soldiers is easily one of the worst films I have ever seen, Universal Soldiers is one of those films that defies any attempt to convey just how awful it is, Universal Soldiers is one of those films where you really need to see it to realise how awful it is but don't take that as a recommendation since it's painful to sit through. At a mere 80 minutes it's still boring & dull, the plot is awful & mainly consists of a few military soldiers running around a few fields for over an hour. Seriously, 90% of Universal Soldiers is set in a field. The character's are awful, the dialogue is awful & the plot makes zero sense anyway. Why, if these enhanced soldiers are so advanced, can they not find a better way to communicate with each other than drawing symbols on rocks? What's wrong with radios? You would have thought they would have one built in or something. Why, if these enhanced soldiers are so advanced, do they kill people with wooden spears? Surely a bullet would be better? What do they do with the weapons they steal from the dead soldiers? At the end one has trouble opening a door while two are taken out by a skinny little woman using nothing more than a branch. Hardly the fearsome state of the killing machines they are constantly described as. There are so many things wrong with Universal Soldiers it's scary, probably the cheapest looking & frankly crappiest film I've seen in ages.As well as being a conceptual disaster with an appalling script that makes no logical sense Universal Soldiers is also technically awful from the sound mike picking up wind that obscure the dialogue to scenes that go from bright daylight to dark evening within itself to some absolute rank CGI computer effects. The Universal Soldiers themselves are embarrassing, guy's dressed in black with what look like cardboard attachments from silly looking shoulder pads to something on their back to a rubbish looking face mount that seems to do nothing. These cyborgs are meant to have incredible eyesight but every time we get a point-of-view shot it's blurry & all one primary colour like red or green & there are these random numbers that don't seem to indicate this & every cyborg has it's name at the top of it's field of vision, presumably in case it forgets it. The action scenes are awful, guns don't seem to fire at random intervals, there's no excitement & no attempt at making something entertaining has been attempted here. There's a bit when the soldiers reach the armoury & I was thinking 'right there's going to loads of weapons here' but when they open it up there's like five small handguns on the wall.I would have thought the budget for this was less than a hundred grand, shot entirely in some fields & a few sheds the costumes, music & effects are all poor. Of course Universal Soldiers has absolutely nothing to do with Universal Soldier & feels more like Predator (1987) & The Terminator (1984) rip-offs. The acting is awful with most of the cast just screaming, screeching & shouting.Universal Soldiers is surely the worst film of 2007, it's got to be a contender for the worst film I have ever seen too & I've sat through some stinkers. There is not one positive aspect about Universal Soldiers, seriously if you think big Hollywood studios make the worst films & think smaller budget indie films are better than I present Universal Soldiers as evidence. I honestly can't see how anyone could gain any entertainment from this atrocious film.

imdblog-604-716570 As the summary indicates, this is one film I urge people to watch for 2 main reasons. Reason number 1: You will learn to appreciate good movies all the more. Reason number 2: If you can get past the fact that all involved in the making of this film are acting like it's a really serious production, it will be rather funny. Truly, if this was made as a comedy it would have been hysterical! On the downside, the sound is obscured by the ambient sounds of nature as well as their uniforms, which constantly seem to scrape the microphones, causing an unnecessary amount of painful noises. The acting is way over the top. The story is full of holes, although watching the behind the scenes featurette may fill a few in. Improper weapons handling throughout the entire movie. Obvious finger marks on some of the makeup. The Private yells at her superiors quite a lot with no repercussions, and an assortment of other terrors.It's a really awful movie, but I do have a good laugh when I watch it.

the_real_smile This is a very very bad movie, my regret is that I had the movie before the previous comments were posted.The Universal Soldiers have 5 minutes of screen time (but that is more then enough) they look like the borg and have the costumes of villains out of a Blake's-7 episode. 90% of the screen time the marines are yelling to each other, and when a marine dies ... I can't even describe how badly that is worked out.Griff Furst has really destroyed his career with this movie, because the 'original' (well ....) with Jean-Claude van Damme and Dolph Lundgren wasn't the best either, but entertaining, but to do it worse ??? That is almost impossible, and then the nerve to do a "behind the scenes" on the DVD, like after watching this movie that is worth the time to watch aarrgghhhhhh!!!!

kot426 I watched it all the way through just to gaze at two of the main male actors. YUM! Worth the agony :-) Hated the constant whining, horrible, and I do mean horrible acting. Obviously this is the third installment of the Universal Soldier. The first one was the best. In this one the "soldiers" were fleeting and could have been shown a lot more than they were. Strange script. Totally unbelievable ending. These actors should never act again. This director should run for the hills. Several of the actors, male & female, would make a lot of money as strippers or such. I really don't understand why everyone always wants to make these crappy sequels. Totally off the wall.